Our little Harper has many quirks. i love each one of them, even the ones that make her throw tantrums over the dumbest stuff. she is the most unique kid i’ve ever met and i’m only half saying that because she’s mine. she really is special, and anyone who has ever met her, even for just a moment in the grocery store, will tell you that. (and without me holding a gun to their head yelling “say it. SAY IT!”).
one of her “things” the past few months has been saying “bicycle” and “icicle”. we have no idea where it came from or what it means or why she says it, but boy does she say it. she picks up her play phone and calls the crap out of bicycle. she also picks up crackers, sticks and other random objects to call bicycle. i think bicycle is her imaginary friend.
after a hilarious phone conversation with my friend Mae about it, i promised her a video. why do kids never do what you want them to do when a camera is on them? even if it’s something they do four million times per day? they enjoy making liars out of us, no?
well i got a little bit. please enjoy.
i only laughed a little when i asked her to say “hi” and it sounded like she said “die”. also? WHY does my voice sound like that? and YES, i always find my child this funny, because she is. i’m super proud of myself that this video doesn’t showcase a snort. because that’s how i do.
my apologies in advance if this post is all over the place. i’m having one of those weeks where the anxiety level about things that need to be done (blog, emails to return, dishes piling up, laundry that needs to be re-washed because it sat overnight, and OMG WHO HAS A XANAX?) is at the level where i blog about needing a xanax. ::deep breath::
man. i have been busy this week. yet the house is kind of a hot mess. but enough about me. well, not really cause this is my blog, so it is really all about me, right? that’s right. now be good little readers and tell me i’m not bat poop crazy, ok?
my mamas birthday was monday. we went out for yummy chinese food and Harper decided since she is a big girl now and all, that she wouldn’t do the same thing to GG that she did last year, which was spit up all over her. yay Harper! and happy birthday GG! i love you so much mom!
i’ve been trying so hard to craft this week, but it just isn’t working. swear on johnny depp, i am going to tonight. i have my wine corkboard almost done, but alas it sits on the dining room table, begging to be blogged about in a tutorial. i have 4 million trillion blog ideas in my head but none are coming to fruition because i’m so busy searching the internet for xanax (i keed i keed). i have a few blog awards from a few lovely ladies but can’t seem to find any time or energy to properly accept them (but i really appreciate them!). what i’m saying is I’M CRAZY.
now that we’ve established that, i have a few things to say. i will use bullets to ensure my head does not explode.
i am buying my BlogHer ticket this week. because of you guys. i am so far beyond appreciative of your generosity. if any of you still would like to see your name on my shirt/donate a buck or two, the button is over there ———————->
my rooming situation at BlogHer is going to literally make my face fall off from excitement.
i’m number 2 on the Top Baby Blogs, again because of you guys. thanks for clicking, i really appreciate it.
i like cheese. preferably parmesan eaten straight up. this will inevitably make kenny from smonkyou send me mean messages.
feeling completely crazy because i emailed The Bloggess (who do i think i am? really.) and she hasn’t written me back and omg, what if she was totally creeped out by my email (subject: i love you) and hates me and has already called the authorities and runs screaming when i see her at BlogHer and omg I DIE!
if you’re still reading (and bless your heart if you are), here are some photos from this past week or so.
photo summary : my mom rules and is precious. nora and harper = cute. my friends are amazing.
post summary: i’m a raving lunatic. i am also over dramatic.
so you know how i’m number 8 on the Top Baby Blogs website? because of you guys? well every 4 months they reset all the numbers. this means everyone goes to zero and starts over. mean, right?
i mean, i get it. you have to give everyone a fair chance, even the crappy people (TOTALLY KIDDING, don’t email me). it’s just that it’s kind of exhausting trying to get votes pretty much on the daily, and then all of a sudden rip my hard-earned number 8 away from my super competitive hands. it’s just rude.
i know what you’re thinking, positive thinkers. “why not look at it as a chance to be number one”. you know what? YOU’RE RIGHT. so right that i’m devoting an entire damn blog post to begging for votes. i guess it’d also be an ok time to explain how the whole thing works since sometimes people get confused (and rightly so) by the voting process.
when you click on the TBB button on my blog, or click any link i post on FB or twitter asking for votes (god i have no life), all you have to do is click. yeah, i know, it takes you to the main page of TBB and theres no place to vote, and all that. but it’s all good, because my special button (snicker) and any links i post have a super secret code that magically registers a vote for HH. so literally, a click is all we need. and? you can click every day. and really, i’d appreciate it if you did.
what do i win? absolutely nothing. but as a uber competitive person (like, sometimes Scot won’t play games with me), i don’t need a prize, i just need to win. being better than everyone else just feels good.
i’ve heard a rumor that this reset is happening today, the 22nd (though i can find no solid evidence that this is correct), so since a lot of you will be awake before me due to time zones, here is my plea for your help. if it’s not true, then please disregard until it really does reset (of which i will inform you and again, beg). but if it is true! i hope to awaken to a big fat number 1 next to Harper’s Happenings or everyone is going down. and by going down, i mean absolutely nothing because i have no power over the internet or any of you.
remember that one time when i posted a blog about not liking to work or go to school? (uh, you should, because that was like 5 hours ago). well my insanely amazing (and honest) friend Mae (who needs no introduction, you all know who she is) got her panties in a bunch about it. and? i love her infintitely for that.
this email was not intended for anyone else to see, but since i have rightly been put in my place, i wanted to share. everyone, and i repeat everyone, should have a friend like this. but don’t steal her or i will hunt you down. MINE.
[disclaimer: SWEARING WITHIN. like F-bombs and all. and a few mean names. sorry family. but kind of not because it helps the whole "putting me in my place thing".]
subject: I can’t let this continue
See, here’s the thing about me. I don’t let people “talk bad” about my friends. Even when they want to do it to themselves, or even when it’s supposed to be taken as self deprecating or whatthefuck ever. Not when I can tell that on some level they mean it. Making fun of your shoulder pads or desire to shave too young is not the same thing!
You said this about yourself:
“i WISH i had that thing that i loved doing so much that i had gone to school to become it. really, i do. it’s not that i don’t like anything, it’s just that i’m not good at anything.”
If someone said that about your daughter you’d punch their throat and you know it.
I should slap you. You don’t get to talk about my friend like that, you meaniehead. You can’t say those things about her BECAUSE THEY’RE NOT TRUE.
You are good at so many things.
You are a wonderful Mother, and I know that’s not something that feels like a big deal but it is. That baby girl is so lucky. You can tell how good you are at it by how happy and well adjusted she is, and how SMART! She is so smart! I have never met her in real life but SHE TALKS TO BICYCLES VIA CRACKERS for fuck’s sake and that is fucking smart. Next time you have a day where you can’t get out into the world for some reason, count her vocabulary. Then google vocabulary for whatever age she is when you get around to that. She’s freakish.
You make awesome crafts!! Seriously, everyone tells you this and I know I haven’t begged you to open an Etsy shop in the last 20 minutes or so but that’s only because I don’t want you to kick me. You have a creative talent that people go to school for for a really long time. I don’t know that you recognize it as such though, and I really really think that you should and you would be amazing at it. The things you make are beautiful and SHUT UP about the backsides of them. The backsides are supposed to look stupid, honey. It’s one of the reasons people pay extra for handmade shit. It’s the front sides that matter and yours are amazing.
You’re a great friend. Truly. Your friendship means a lot to me, sometimes more than you know. That’s also not an easy thing. If I talk about that anymore I might cry so I’m gonna stop.
Last but far from least (and another example of something people go to school to learn how to do, but you have a natural talent for), you are a talented writer Mandy. Writing is not about grammar and punctuation. Writing is about communicating feelings, a sense of time, or place, or a million other things to readers. Its about telling a story and making people care about what happens next. It’s about taking them somewhere. Mandy you take people somewhere ALL THE TIME. I mean honestly, your blog is so very approachable and personable and you make people laugh and cry and THINK all in the same post and you do that almost every single fucking time you publish. I don’t think you get how rare that is or what it means. you have a gift. bitch.
Sorry. I know I said I wouldn’t let people talk bad about you, but that was a loving “bitch”, you get me?
You shine like a star, Mandy. Yes, you are smart and pretty and funny and I know those aren’t rocket science but they are also not all that you’re good at and the next time I hear/read you talking like that about my friend we’re gonna have a fucking fight.
I know I know, I GET the sarcasm. But I fear that in this case it’s a veneer. I admit to the possibility of transference here. I have personal insecurities because I didn’t finish college. But I don’t think it was ALL sarcasm, which means on some level you believe it.
And if that’s true… it’s not ok.
Love,
Mae
______________________________________________
so there it is. i could go on for a bit about how i wasn’t trying to say i sucked at life and how i know i am good at many things, but honestly i am scared of another loving email that makes me cry and junk.
post summary: Mae is scary. sometimes i don’t explain myself well. i rule at many things. in fact i am amazing.
