Posted on | March 24, 2010 | 28 Comments
Harper waking up from nap time is easily one of my favorite parts of the day. not only does it mean i’ve had a little break, she’s gotten the rest needed to not throw tantrums until bedtime, but she wakes up so happy. she will start talking to herself and laughing at first, and when i hear that, i go in.
oh hey. was i talking to myself too loudly?
the minute i open the door, she yells “HEYYYYY!”. usually i scoop her up and she lays her head on my shoulder for a big hug and she tells me how her nap was (all totally intelligible of course). but yesterday i snapped a few pics because she is always so happy after nap time. i like that about her, because i am always groggy and weird after a nap.
i had a dream about a bunny and it was soft and it gave me bananas and let me put a saddle on it’s back and i rode it like falcor and mommy it was AWESOME!
did you hear that ma? a banana giving bunny! now that i think about it, i’d like a banana.
no seriously lady, get me outta here and peel me a banana. i’m wearing a v-neck sweater, i tell you what to do.
Posted on | March 23, 2010 | 37 Comments
there are a few things you should know about me guys. since we’re in this internet relationship and all.
i am a pushover.
i care too much what others think of me.
i let nonsense and irrational people affect me too much.
i’m hoping that this insomnia induced, brain barf of a post will help me sort through it, and i’m kind of sorry ahead of time that it won’t be the per uge happy, cute post i try to keep up around here (another thing i do too much: apologize for things i shouldn’t). this is my blog however, and one thing i love about blogging is this is my space to do what i want. tonight this morning i want to share some not so savory things about my personality in hopes that once i get it out and see it in print i can grow from it.
many things in my life have changed in my 20′s, since getting married, since moving to a new place, since having a child. such is life. the few things i can’t shake are the things mentioned above. i let people walk all over me, yes siree. i have never been one to call people out for their ridiculous behavior, rude comments or blatantly passive aggressive mouth spouting. instead i internalize, make myself sick or make my husband listen to my true feelings. why? because if i were to tell someone where to go, they would then think poorly of me, and that my friends would lead to number 2 – caring too much what people think of me. as i near 30 i am starting to see clearly how little that matters. too many hours wasted, brain cells spent, tears cried. over what? you don’t like me? who the hell cares? why should i care?
perhaps i need some morning affirmations written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. note to self: buy lipstick.
the most ironic thing about this part of my personality is that i constantly tell others not to let people walk on them and i can’t tell you how many times i’ve said to a friend “who cares? their loss.” yet i can’t for the life of me follow my own instructions. my husband says i am this way because i am a caring person and all. which i appreciate very much, but i don’t want to be a mouse. i’m reaching my breaking point with various situations in my life and i feel i am at a place where a middle finger would be best suited worn everywhere. really.
i find my biggest challenges are irrational people, stretchers of the truth (i wish you weren’t a liar) and the just plain crazies. so you can imagine my dismay that these are the individuals that take up the most of my brain matter. this has got to stop. i’m putting an end to that now. because really? really? that is ass backwards. i may be a door mat, but an idiot, no. but this is human nature is it not? i can’t possibly the only one out there doing this. otherwise what are all those medications for?
[making jokes to make up for uncomfortable late night confessions? check.]
i need to start taking my own advice. like, yesterday 5 years ago. when i was 22 i had a stamp at work that was simply giant letters saying BFD. i thought it was hilarious and i liked to stamp it on things that annoyed me or as a joke to coworkers. i wish to johnny depp i still had that stamp. it would help me greatly in my new quest to stop being a doormat and take charge of my own opinions and feelings. because seriously, if everyone else gets to have their opinions, then i do too right?
i suppose stamping people on the forehead would be kind of half-assing it because then i’d be the one being passive agressive, but it’d be funny right? “i don’t like you” ::stamps forehead – BFD::, “you’re a bad friend and you’re ugly and dumb” ::stamps face – BFD::
i bring up the stamp because seriously – if someone finds me obnoxious, ugly, stupid, lame, unfunny, offensive, wrong or overall unlikeable – BEE EFF DEE. why should i spend any time, even a second, thinking about that person? i know right? i shouldn’t.
i totally told you i’d work through this in my post. i was totally right.
totally.
i have pretty much everything i’ve ever dreamt for myself in life. an amazing and supportive husband, healthy child who owns my world, incredible family and wonderful in-laws i proudly call family as well. it’s high time i stop giving any mental credit at all to people who don’t matter. if you don’t like me, my words, my opinions, my sense of humor, my face, someone i know or care about deeply, my attitude or the things i do or have done, you’re entitled to your opinions. but darn it, i am, too.
so there.
post summary: if you read only the summaries, then i may have a stamp with your name on it. you can’t just come here and look at my photos and poke around and not read a post or two. sheesh. i’m not a doormat, you know.
Posted on | March 18, 2010 | 47 Comments
hey Time? i’ve got a bone to pick with you.
remember when i was all pregnant and eating celery like it was going out of style and waddling around complaining about how it felt like a bowling ball was about to bust through my pelvic bone all chuck norris like and i kept begging you to go faster and you didn’t?
a plea for help.
and then how once i had Harper you pulled a nasty move and SPED UP? this is my open letter to you about how i don’t appreciate it. one day, which feels like yesterday (how do you DO that?), we brought home a wittle tiny one of these:
(my super sonic appologies to all the people who just felt their ovaries twitch – i know the fever is running RAMPANT on the interwebs these days)
well, Time, that was all good and dandy except now? now i don’t have that. now that little basket of rainbows walks, talks and laughs at me when i scold her. she has hair i can put in a ponytail (not ok, those are for real people, NOT babies) and eyelashes that make me think she totally sneaks my curler and mascara when i’m not looking. she sits in a swing and says “whee”, she flips through books while saying “slippy fib bye bye HAI, oh yukey bam bicycle” which absolutely means she can read and i don’t appreciate it, not one bit.
do you know what she does now, Time? let me tell you, since it’s your fault and all. when i put her down for a nap? she blows me kisses and says “byyyyye” as i close the door. and then? AND THEN? when i change her diaper post nap? she hands me her blankie and her binkie and says “bye” to them as i put them into her crib and tell her she’ll see them at night night time. i’m sorry, what? i’ve never met a newborn who can do that shiz. which means only one thing – you’re magic is working. you and your witch craft is WORKING.
NOT a newborn.
i seriously remember the day she was born like it was yesterday, but hello, it wasn’t. and if my calculations are correct with the way you’ve been working out so far, this means Harper will be telling me she hates me in about 6 months (sorry mom). she’ll be all “but i don’t WANNA drive grandmas old car, i want a NEW car because everyone will make FUN of meeeee” (again…sorry mom)(and kind of grandma, but let’s be real it was a chevy celebrity) and slamming her door and begging for her own line in her room (oh wait, this isn’t 1992…). SIGH.
what i mean is? Time? YOU ARE A COTTON HEADED NINNYMUGGIN. no one likes you. when we ask you to speed up, you say no (hello, have you ever heard of TGIF? jerk) and when we ask you to slow down you switch it up and take off with our babies. who peed in your chocolate cheerios? why must you mock us, Time?
it’s mean. so THERE.
love sharpening my knives,
mandy
and p.s.? don’t even get me started on daylight savings and children napping. you’re kind of an idiot.
post summary: Doc Brown was on to something.
